I’ve got a work colleague who to me at least seems like a pretty normal, nice guy. Is he the most fun person in the world? Not necessarily, but doesn’t strike me as a weirdo, is good looking, can hold a conversation, and tries to be friendly with everyone.
I ask him sometimes what he did over the weekend and he used to just come up with a bullshit answer like “ah man, I was so tired I just chilled all weekend” but I began to notice he said that almost always.
We had a talk this last week and he admitted he doesn’t really have any friends and kind of always been that way.
It was shocking to me because this guy seems totally normal as far as I can tell. So it makes me wonder, how does this happen?
I am a special needs parent whose son's disorder is so rare that they couldn't detect it in utero. He was diagnosed at almost 1 after, in addition to the many other problems he was having, he began to have seizures and thus genetic testing.
I am currently pregnant and on a parent forum where so many parents post about not knowing if they would do the early genetic screening and it's followed by even more parents saying it would matter what the results are they wouldn't do anything about it.
Life is hard. Life as a special needs parent is even harder. I've lived both ways and I hate the naivety and toxic positivity that dwells among these communities.
I hate that my son was born with his issues. It has taken a toll on every aspect in my life. There is no real specials needs child care. The amount of procedures, doctors appointments, surgeries, extensive therapies, equipment is ungodly expensive and exhuasting. He suffers in ways that I can't do anything about. My relationship has gravely suffered, we never get to spend time without him and when we do it's brief.
There isn't a day that goes by that I don't wish this wasn't my life. I see too many people on instagram etc. Posting in matching clothes with inspirational quotes and nobody is being honest. It sucks. It's not fair to me or my family.
It's isolating as hell. People act like you're an amazing parent just because you're going through this when half the time I'm falling apart.
Does any of this mean I don't love and cherish my son? No. But, If faced with results of another genetic disorder or something similar, I would absolutely terminate.